How To Write If You Have A Cat

 

How To Write If You Have A Cat

If you are a writer who lives with a cat, or multiple cats, then this blog post is for you!

Here are 3 handy tips to get your cat to leave you alone for long enough so you can write something. Guaranteed* to work!

(*nothing is guaranteed with cats except for the fact that they want your attention when you are busy!) 

 

Step One

Serve up distractions for your cat. Toys, catnip, a windup mouse, any of those work. Toss the toy in one direction for your cat to chase, while you sprint in the other direction to your laptop. Try and get three words down before your cat follows you and sits on your keyboard. 

 

Step Two

Create a barricade. You will need to hole up your writing supplies in one area, preferably behind a secure door. Barricade yourself inside, use extra timber and a spare mattress if necessary. This is your bunker now. 

If the noise your cat makes on the other side of the door becomes too much, try out some noise cancelling headphones.  

It's important to note that your cat may wreck your house during this time. Schedule cleaning hours, have a carpenter on speed dial; all the usual clean up for cat destruction repair jobs.

But if you got to write a chapter, it's worth it, right? :extreme sarcasm:

(Please note, you are entirely responsible for your own cat's destruction, if/when such a destruction occurs!)

 

Step Three

Give up writing and pay attention to your cat. Accept your fate. No words are being written today. Pet the cat instead.